You might call me a bit of a “workaholic”. I tend to throw myself into my work and not do much else. I’ve been known to come in early, stay late, and my manager has had to force me to take a lunch break on many occasions. So when I show up at work on my days off, my associates are not surprised. The thing is though, I’m just not that great at taking a day off.
I wish I could say this over-dedicated personality comes from wanting to do the very best I can at everything, which part of it is, but a bigger part of it is liking to have everything planned out. Fear of change is not something new I’ve discovered about myself, I’ve always liked structure, and many people who have anxiety feel the same.
I work five days a week and spend the other two days feeling like I’m forgetting something. Days off for me normally consist of me taking a few hours to relax then spending the rest of the time wandering around wondering what I’m supposed to be doing. Making plans ahead of time is a great idea, but sometimes plans fall through, or all my friends will have other commitments, or I’ll just want to be by myself for a weekend; Those weekends are the worst. I’ll want to hang out by myself but if I stay in bed all day my mood is going to take a nosedive.
Recently a friend of mine suggested that I plan my days off, so I don’t feel so lost. I’ve been told this before by therapists, but it somehow just made a lot more sense coming from a friend. I mean my work days are planned out, down to the half hour, so it would make sense to plan my days off as well. I decided to take his expert advice and give it a try;
9:00 – Good Morning, Jenn – Read something!
10:00 – Up and at ’em – Get in the shower… now.
10:30 – Eat breakfast – 1 large coffee, 2 boiled eggs
11:30 – Time to get dressed! – Wear something that makes you smile 🙂
12:00 – Head upstairs and visit Steph and Poppy (my niece, who happens to be a yorkie)
1:00 – Coffee date with Gillian! – Jumping Bean, Duckworth Street.
4:00 – Solo coffee/blog writing – Still at Jumping Bean
5:00 – You’ve definitely overstayed your welcome – Go home.
6:00 – If you haven’t already, edit/post blogpost – Post photo on Instagram for blog
7:30 – Pick up Ji Hyun from the airport! – My Korean sister is finally home!!
8:00 – Relax until bedtime – Get things ready for work tomorrow
10:00 – Goodnight Moon
So that was the plan. It’s currently 4:00 and the day has been great so far! I haven’t done anything all that different from what I normally would have but I feel so much better than I have on past days off. Maybe it has nothing to do with the planning, maybe its due to the beautiful weather, or the long-overdue coffee date with my dearest friend, Gillian. I’m not entirely sure, but regardless of the reason, a good day is a good day.
It might sound a little foolish but making my day seem busy by having things planned out resulted in a very calm and relaxing day. Planning out my days off is something I’m 100% going to continue to do. It is something I’m going to recommend everyone to do, especially someone with anxiety. The uncertainty of what you’re going to do is eliminated, planning out your day is a great form of self-help, and actually doing what you’ve planned is kind of empowering. So even if all I did today was relax and write, I accomplished everything I had planned, and that feels pretty damn good.